Post-Run Pancakes, and creating a food community


Over the past few months, William and I have been hosting, or being treated to, many shared meals with friends. We’ve been living in Eugene for over two years now, and though we still don’t love the city or consider it our long-term home, we’re slowly finding ways to make a community while we’re here. In almost every way, that developing of community centers around food.

We have a couple friends here that, unlike virtually any others so far, I trust can cook for me. I won’t be unknowingly eating gluten and getting cross contaminated, and I’ll enjoy the food and company. I won’t stress about what will be on the menu beforehand and if I’ll have to miss out on half the spread, or need to plan to take a side dish just in case. I can go about the whole experience being totally relaxed and spontaneous. This experience, though I know is the norm for those who don’t have food allergies and/or a history of disordered eating, feels like the biggest of victories for me, and one I don’t take lightly.

Like many people who have struggled with an eating disorder, I’ve always been drawn to food. I grew up just completely fascinated with it, always experimenting and exploring, always wanting to know more. Nothing about that has changed but the sharing of it, either at a friend or relatives’, or just spontaneously going out to eat, has shifted dramatically in the last decade as I began to develop more tactics for avoiding eating with others, or later, when I realized many of my health problems were attributed to food intolerances, and most friends and family no longer knew how to prepare food that was gluten, dairy, and for the most part meat-free.

That left me (and still leaves me), generally really stressed and anxious about gatherings that involve food. I don’t like to be the center of attention. I don’t enjoy having to make special requests. But I also don’t enjoy going to meals knowing I won’t really get to participate in them. As much as many of us have heard the advice to just focus on the people rather than the food, there’s something about the food that draws us together and opting out of that aspect is to me, a little like trying to arrive at a complete and finished puzzle, without having half the puzzle pieces.

Related to this, I like what Aran Goyoaga of Cannelle et Vanille said recently in an interview on the emotion of food:

I think my eating disorder and having left my roots really left me in limbo for many years. I stripped myself of identity so I could know who I am inside and what my purpose is while I am here. I have realized that the vulnerability I have felt the last few years by sharing a bit more of my true story of anxiety and depression have connected me to people and myself in ways I didn’t think were possible. And it’s interesting that I did this through cooking and sharing food, which for many years had such an emotional weight attached to it. It’s through the act of cooking for others and sharing a table that we can make time to connect at deeper levels. We can access levels of empathy and intimacy that are hard to feel in other ways. Also let’s not forget that food has tremendous healing energy. It can ground us and make us stronger or totally mess us up both physically and emotionally.

Other than being really grateful for friends that love to eat and cook similarly to me, and for those that go out of their way to accommodate my gluten and dairy-free needs by learning how to cook and/or bake in this way just so I can be included, I’m learning that being more assertive, giving, and willing to educate others, both about food intolerances and allergies, and about the mental health aspects that some of us bring to eating, are really important. Both of these often parallel topics are ones that I feel a little more called to having a conversation about with friends over a good meal, rather than brushing them under the table and pretending everything is just okay.

With that, The Recipe Redux invited us to to make and share bread this month. Though I’ve alluded to my current sourdough fixation here and on instagram many times over the last year, I’m still in the experimenting stage — because the art and perfection of slow bread is something I’ve long been called to and having a finished recipe that is ready to share still feels a long way off. I do have a really decent sourdough pizza crust going lately but given this dreary, cold, late winter season, my own personal need for comfort foods in the way of pancakes, and past history of pancakes making quite the meal to share with others, this quick little bread-based meal is one I hope you get the time to make. It makes my favorite gluten-free and vegan pancakes so far, is 100% whole-grain, and with the help of a coffee/spice grinder, most of the flour is fresh milled so it’s really quite nutrient-packed. I’ve also taken out all the oil and added in antioxidant-rich sunflower seed butter which gives it a really nice rich flavor. And because I’m still working my way through the last of the season’s winter squash, I find a really nice topping is a spiced squash and sunflower butter puree.

All together, both because these are comforting yet wholesome, and packed full of all the antioxidant nutrients (vitamins A, E, selenium, zinc), B-vitamins, magnesium, and iron that athletes need, I think these are great with the winter squash topping for after workout meals (that’s running for me), or perhaps just to share with a friend or loved one when you both need good conversation and lots of late-winter nourishment.



Post Run Pancakes, serves about 2
These make nice, fluffy, whole-grain pancakes. If you’re without or adverse to a little xanthan gum, either leave out or add a little more ground flax. They won’t be quite as fluffy, but still really good!
1/3 cup / 60 grams millet
1/4 cup / 40 grams buckwheat
1/4 cup / 20 grams chickpea flour
1/4 tsp. xanthan gum
1/8 tsp. salt
1 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1 Tbs. ground flax mixed with 3 Tbs. warm water
3/4-1 cup non-dairy milk
1 Tbs. raw apple cider vinegar
1 Tbs. sunflower seed butter
coconut oil, for cooking
  • Whisk the vinegar into 3/4 cup of non-dairy milk and set aside for a few minutes.
  • Heat your skillet or griddle where you will be cooking the pancakes. They’ll cook over medium-high heat.
  • In a coffee/spice grinder or food processor, add buckwheat and millet grains and grind until they reach a smooth flour consistency. Then, mix them in a medium bowl with the chickpea flour, xanthan gum, salt, baking powder, and baking soda.
  • In a separate bowl, whisk together the flax-water mixture, milk, and sunflower butter. Pour the liquids into the dry ingredients and whisk lightly until combined. Add more milk as needed.
  • Lightly oil the skillet with coconut oil, and use about 1/3 cup of batter per pancake. Flip the pancakes when the bubbles appear on top and the bottoms are browned.
  • Cook on the second side until cooked through and browned on the bottom.

Spiced Winter Squash Puree
1-2 cups mashed/pureed winter squash
2 Tbs. sunflower seed butter
a few dashes each of cinnamon, ginger, turmeric, cloves, and black pepper
a pinch of sea salt

  • In a little dish, mash together all the ingredients and season to taste with sweetener, as desired. Serve over the pancakes.



buttercup squash soup with coconut, sage + quince

buttercup squash soup with coconut, sage + quince



a few weeks ago, i discovered there’s a seemingly abandoned quince tree a couple streets over from us. instead of inquiring about picking the fruit to the nearby house or walking my ladder down the neighborhood and being for real about the situation, i instead ended my marathon-season track workouts for weeks by practicing my plyometric jumps into the lower branches, snagging one golden floral fruit each time, and smuggling it’s precious but ugly self back home to add to my for-soup collection.

i had an idea in my head about updating this soup and instead of sending the floral quince notes throughout, piling a few thin sauteed slices on top with fresh sage. the result is absolutely holiday (or just really nice self-care) worthy.




speaking of holidays, here is what i’m making for the Thanksgiving weekend:

i. a brussels-heavy variation of this salad.

ii. apple pie. i’m planning to recreate the best gluten + dairy free pie crust i’ve made so far, adapted from Alanna’s recipe and fill it with apples + spice inspiration from Renee.

iii. if the weekend calls for more cozy time in the kitchen, i’ll be making cornbread stuffing (per William’s request), and/or pumpkin, sage + rosemary baked risotto, or perhaps just end the weekend with that cornbread alongside my favorite deep/rich vegetable-heavy chili with chocolate and walnuts.

iv. and more of this soup! the Recipe Redux challenge this month is to add some naturally colored holiday treats and trimmings to the table and this soup is definitely colorful! and, importantly, it’s also tasty. i gobbled up the first and then second batch before i took time for photos, so the third round, whipped up in the final days before we head to eastern oregon for family time, is going home to share.




buttercup squash soup with coconut, sage + quince, serves about 4

Curious about quince? They’re a seriously old fruit, similar in many ways to pears, but much more floral in flavor and aroma. They require cooking too, as their heavy tannins and raw texture will dissuade even the hungriest neighborhood scavenger! Since they’re slightly precious and can be difficult to find outside of local shops and markets, a pear or apple can be substituted, or completely left out for a less sweet/interesting ending. For a little more substance, I’ve often been stirring in either cooked garbanzos or sometimes marinated/seasoned tempeh to my soup and rounding it out with some whole grain sourdough bread for a full meal deal. Also, use any squash you like. I used the last of the Buttercup from my garden. It’s a sweet, dense, slightly dry flesh variety, and any of the Kabocha, Hubbard and Butternut varieties are also good alternatives. 

2 lb. buttercup winter squash, exterior rinsed of any remaining soil
1 + tsp. coconut oil, divided
1 large onion, medium-diced
1 tsp. dried thyme
3 cups water or vegetable broth
2/3 cups full-fat coconut milk
1 1/2 Tbs. apple cider vinegar
3/4 tsp. sea salt
ground black pepper
1 quince, cored and thinly sliced
1-2 tsp. minced fresh sage

  1. Preheat oven to 375F. Slice the squash in half and turn cut-side-down on a baking dish. Add 1/2- to 1-inch water to bottom of pan and roast for about 45-60 minutes, until a fork slides easily through the skin and flesh of the squash. Let cool at least 5 minutes before handling.
  2. Set a large pot on medium heat and add coconut oil. Add the chopped onion and sauté 5-8 minutes, stirring occasionally, until it softens and becomes translucent. Then stir in the thyme and water or broth.
  3. Once the squash is done roasting and is cool enough to handle, scoop out the seeds and discard. Then scoop the flesh into the pot. You can either discard the skin or toss it in, as it is definitely edible and will add a little texture towards the end result.
  4. Add the coconut milk and apple cider vinegar.  Bring to a boil and then turn down to simmer for 5 minutes. Let cool slightly, and then using either a blender or food processor, puree in batches until you have a smooth consistency. Turn it back into the pot, and add salt and ground black pepper and taste to adjust seasoning.
  5. For the quince, heat a sauté pan over medium-high heat. Add a small amount of coconut oil, sliced quince, and minced sage. Try to spread the slices out over the pan so they are not overlapping and cook for about 2-3 minutes on each side, until they are becoming golden and crispy on the edges.
  6. Serve the soup hot with the sauteed quince scattered on top. Enjoy!



Delicata Squash, Rosemary + Cranberry Flatbread


Like many people, I struggle in winter and it usually hits full force in early to mid-February. This year, it hit along with our first snow/ice storm before winter had technically even begun. This time around, I think the combination of having to set aside plans repeatedly due to weather, feeling trapped at home, and the end of a successful training cycle and race (my first marathon), all culminated in a bit of feeling glum and fearful about the what’s next–as I inevitably tend to be fearful that there’s no way I can possibly live up to my own expectations in each new year.

To be sure, I’m slowly working my way out, and coming up with colorful, yet seasonal meals is one outlet for doing so. Along with this super tasty flatbread, I’ve got a few links to share that have been helpful in this “season.” Enjoy!



In this New Year:
Trust the light, face the darkness, and live with the questions.
The One Thing.  Absolutely love this video.
17 Recovery Goals for 2017
I don’t have a resolution for the new year, per se, as I’m continuing what I’ve been working on for the last couple years. One of the little things that feeds into that process is Filtering Out the Noise.

Sugar is the ‘alcohol of the child’, yet we let it dominate the breakfast table
Big Sugar’s Secret Ally? Nutritionists

Social Skills:
Tired and not wonder woman. Applauding and nodding along to Emma’s frustration about the blogging world these days. I’ve had similar experiences. And while expecting and/or demanding instant replies is endemic in our current culture, I’m glad Emma was willing to speak out against it.
On having conversations with those from a different perspective. And progress.



A good book:

The Whole-Food Guide to Strong Bones by Annemarie ColbinLike her previous book, Food and Healing, this one calls into question our skewed reliance on dairy for bone health. As an individual who was allergic to cow’s dairy as a baby, “grew out of it,” and then had many symptoms come back in my early twenties, I’ve long been taking calcium supplements and have been fearful that I’m not getting enough, even as I’ve researched and constantly questioned whether I need to take a supplement. After reading this book, which is supported by all the research I have read, I finally feel comfortable and confident that my calcium supplement is not necessary and may be doing more harm than good. This is an individual journey for sure, but if you’re interested in nutrition and bone health in particular, it is a great read.

To Eat:
Grapefruit-Roasted Beets with White Beans– I made this with a cashew cream thinned with additional grapefruit juice instead of the pistachio butter. Yum!
Moroccan Butternut Squash, Wild Rice + Garbanzos
Moroccan Quinoa Salad– This was the meal that fueled the before and after of my December marathon. Add a little kale and garbanzos (my go-to’s) and it becomes a full meal. The best.



Delicata Squash, Rosemary + Cranberry Flatbread, serves 2-3
There are three components here, but they’re each easy and can be made ahead. Combined, they make a nutritious post-holiday meal that tastes like winter should, in my opinion. Sub out any other type of winter squash but if you do, you might want to remove the peel. If you can no longer find fresh or frozen cranberries, dried can be used, but you’ll want to use less and add more liquid. 

Cranberry Chutney:
1 tsp. good quality canola oil
1/2 large or 1 small onion, diced
1 clove garlic, minced
1/4 cup sherry, vegetable broth, or water
2 Tbs. balsamic vinegar
1 1/2 cups fresh or frozen cranberries
3 medjool dates, pitted and chopped
1/4 tsp. each salt and pepper

1 large delicata squash, halved, deseeded, and chopped
1 sprig fresh rosemary, minced

2/3 cup garbanzo flour
1/3 cup brown rice flour, plus more for dusting
1 Tbs. good quality canola or other high-heat oil
1/2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. sea salt
1/4 cup poultry seasoning or combination of dried sage, oregano + thyme
1/4-1/3 cup water

  • Make the chutney by heating the oil in a small saucepan over medium heat. Add in the onion and saute until soft and translucent. Add in the garlic and cook just until fragrant, about 30 more seconds. Then add in the remaining ingredients, bring to a strong simmer and then turn down to low and cook until it becomes thick and chutney-like, about 15-20 minutes. Remove from heat and set aside.
  • While the chutney is simmering, roast the squash on a parchment lined baking sheet with a little water added at 400 degrees F. It should take 20-25 minutes to become soft. Remove and set aside.
  • Then make the flatbread dough: Mix the flours, oil, baking powder, poultry seasoning, salt, and water. Add enough water to make a dough that can be handled and rolled. Then allow the mixture to rest for about 10 minutes.
  • Roll out the dough on a lightly floured work surface. Transfer to a baking pan or pizza stone and top with the cranberry chutney. Depending on your preference, you will likely only use half of the chutney.
  • Then top the dough with the roasted squash and minced rosemary, and bake at 400 degrees F for 16 minutes.
  • Remove from the oven, slice, and serve.